How To Tell A Real Cowboy From A Stampede Cowboy

Calgary Stampede
Calgary Stampede

With everyone running around the Calgary Stampede with a cowboy hat, it can be difficult to tell the career cowboys from the fellas who pull out their boots just for the 10-day event.

The Huffington Post Alberta | By Michelle Butterfield
Posted: 07/09/2014 2:12 pm EDT | Updated: 07/09/2014 2:59 pm EDT

Here’s a few tips we’ve learned along the way that will help you determine if you’re talking to a real cowboy or some guy who just moseyed over from a corporate event.

A real cowboy…

Real Cowboy

Mario Tama via Getty Images

… works with horses and cow and knows his way around the farm or ranch.


A Stampede cowboy…

Stampede Cowboy

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… works in an office tower. And probably takes his boots off under his desk because they pinch his toes.

A real cowboy…

A real cowboy

Steve Bly via Getty Images

… does not wear shirts emblazoned with big, gaudy logos, unless he’s riding or competing with help from a sponsor.


A Stampede cowboy…

A Stampede cowboy...

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… thinks ads all over a shirt give him barn cred, or something. But really, he just looks like a walking billboard.

A real cowboy…

A real cowboy

Mario Tama via Getty Images

… is humble and polite. He uses words like “miss,” “sir” and “ma’am.”


A Stampede cowboy…

A Stampede cowboy...

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… is known to cat-call the ladies and crush empty beer cans on his head. He forgot his manners at the parade and won’t likely find them again until Stampede is over.

A real cowboy…

A real cowboy

Bread and Butter via Getty Images

… has horse and cow crap on his boots.


A Stampede cowboy…

A Stampede cowboy...

Ron Chapple Stock via Getty Images

… has a bit of crap from a porta-potty on his boots — and maybe a bit of his own urine.

A real cowboy…

A real cowboy

Ablestock.com via Getty Images

… drives a truck.


A Stampede cowboy…

A Stampede cowboy...

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… drives a truck with testicles attached to the hitch.

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